What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
