Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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