Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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