we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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