i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
