I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
