I seem to have left my pride at pride
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
