I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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