she is the kim kardashian of front butts
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You are a genius and a whore.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
