I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
