its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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