I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
