I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
