Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
