READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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