But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
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Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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