when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I believe in your delicious
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