wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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