You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.đź’¨
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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