how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
