I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
