I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
