I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
