Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
