I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
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Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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