Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
