And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
