He uses pillows to masturbate.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.