I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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