You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
