I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize