I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
True college students do jello shots in the library
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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