end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
So. Much. Porn.
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