sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
wanna go halves on a baby?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize