You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
