hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize