I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He felt like a one man threesome
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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