She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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