Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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