I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Sorry my hands just texted you
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza