She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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