Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
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hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
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And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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