Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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