Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
