No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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