What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
