Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
either way he was missing a nipple.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
