My first STD was from a foam party
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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