I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
you inspire me to be a worse person
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
