I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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